?

Log in

Every drop numbs the both of us [entries|friends|calendar]
Eliot Rosewater

[ website | My Website ]
I remember when the days were long..
[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[26 Feb 2010|03:07am]
A letter to Livejournal:

Hello, Livejournal

Yes, it's been awhile. I treat you like a girlfriend that when I finally post you will puff and sneer and point out my faults. I want to leave you as a relic, but in the same breath, admit that I haven't grown as much as I'd like. Far gone are the days that I can lament about how my post-adolescent life hasn't brought me the things I want. I'm now an adult and still dealing with the inadequacies that plague a man of my age and upbringing. In fact, I haven't changed as much as I thought time would inevitably make me. In fact, sometimes I feel like the 19 year old that relied on you before. Age may have brought eliquance, and this brilliant articulation that I only developed by nurturing a calous that I wear like a fucking Johnny Tremaine badge of courage.

But still, I'm glad you're here, and I'm glad you still connect me to people I love. There's a decent chance this is my last post. You'd be amazed at the pressure that comes from writing the last chapter in a significant portion of your life. But I'm comfortable to let those pieces die. It's not really a death, but rather a tree that you prune the dead branches and leaves from. All of the things cut off are done so to provide nutrients to the limbs that still thrive.

I will only say "until next time". Which while hopeful, is the same hope we hold every time we part with someone dear to us. No need to be transcendent here, it is only LJ.
communicate

[29 Feb 2008|12:46am]
So Doug, his lady and I took in some badminton this afternoon at Boulevard Park. This was my first visit to a park as an official B-Ham resident, due to the nice weather. I suppose badminton is not the correct term, as there is no actual net. We just hit the birdie back and forth to each other, so perhaps "shuttlecocking" is a better term for our activity.

It was a beautiful afternoon to watch the sunset and stand on wobbly rocks. As the sun was setting, we noticed what I'll call a tugboat with a huge pump attached to the back of it was shooting streams of water 20 feet into the air. Now I can't tell you the purpose of this boat, but I can comment on my reaction. I immediately, and without thought let out a big "WHOOOO!", as if the boat had just "gone wild" (Which I guess it did, as far as boats are concerned). Not but one second after I start my celebratory yell, some Joe College behind me lets out a similar exclamation.

So here we both are joined together in a mighty howl, not unlike a pack of wolves. I can't answer why I was compelled to do this, but all I know is someone else was equally compelled. I think it may be a coping strategy. Something about the powerful machine, or the fact that water was being shot in the air gives us this impulse that "Something is happening and I need to react to it!" I was a bit embarrassed, but enjoyed the moment all the same.

Also, I've decided (without much thought) that my favorite animal to imitate is a seal (or "water dogs" as I've dubbed them). I'll be $100 richer courtesy of Doug if I can ask someone if they want to "Seal the Deal" and then proceed to bark and clap in a seal-like manner. In case you were wondering, I'm an idiot.

P.S.: Consequently, dogs can also be referred to as "land seals".

2 posts in a week!
3 transmissions communicate

[26 Feb 2008|09:34pm]
Part of the requirement for my classes this quarter is to watch 11 hours of clinical sessions. We watch them on video tapes in high school style chair-desks. I'm watching these women (90% women in my field) interact with the kids and their clipboards. They tell the kid to jump, and then they jump. They hand the kid a fire truck and say "What's that?", all the while scribbling notes and tape recording their conversations to go over intensely to figure out what distortion the kid's making and see if we can change their "th" sound to a proper "s".

I'm sitting in my desk, and I realize I really don't want to do this. I've never had a problem working with small kids, meaning I'm definitely capable of doing so, but it's not my favorite thing in the world. I talk to them as if they're normal people, and they just stare back at me. I'll use the high sing-song tone of voice (We call it "Child-directed speech" in the field) and we get along just fine, but it doesn't necessarily warm the cockles of my heart.

So I'm not enrolling next quarter. I think I'm going to work for T-Mobile up here (They offered me a job once, but I couldn't do it because of school). I'll finish out our lease through September and probably go back to the south end. Doug's leaving next February, so this problem would've come up eventually.

So I'll work for a bit and figure out what I want to do. I mean, I already have a Bachelor's, and after finishing this year I would only have a 2nd one, so I'm at the same level. There's a few school options that look appealing, but I'm ready to just work for awhile and enjoy life without the guilt of loans and academic responsibilities.

I guess I'm giving up, and I can leave with that title, but I know it's not that I can't do this. I just don't think I'll ever end up working in this field, so why keep going? I can honestly say I have no regrets about any step of this so far, but now is the time to step back and figure it out. I know I'm better for the experience.
9 transmissions communicate

Shake the Dust [26 Oct 2007|09:42pm]
Do you know the best part about living above a bar? There's always a subdued bass line going from about 3pm 'til 2am, and as the night goes on, you hear the occasional "whoo" or "ow!" (The good one, not the "oh shit that hurts!" one.) The sound is not obnoxious, nor is it particularly invasive, but should you decide to stay home on a Friday night, there's always a subtle reminder that makes you feel unpopular.

And it's not like I haven't done my fair share of going out since moving to Bellingham, but still, that persistent bass line can still make me feel like I'm sitting on a folding chair in the foyer of my high school multipurpose room clutching my hard plastic glass of punch while the big dance is going on without me.

My biggest reason for not going out tonight is due to a 4-hour "nap" I just finished. I slept from approximately 5:15pm to 9:15pm, which in all honesty is the WORST time to ever nap. You're straddling that line of "Should I just sleep through the night or not?" and once you are up (as I now am), going back to sleep doesn't seem to be an option for some time. I've never been a napper, but since coming to Bellingham and being gainfully unemployed combined with a 9am class that I usually make, it happens.

A couple of weeks ago I announced, through underhanded and emo methods of MySpace and Facebook, that for the first time in 3.5 years, I am single. It's been a very different adjustment and kind of threw a monkey wrench into my "getting settled in Bellingham" plans, but I think I'm finally getting acclimated. It really is probably for the best for both of us at this point, but I always thought of a break up prototypically as "Fuck you! Fuck you! It's over!" but that's certainly not the case in my situation.

The strange thing about being single again is that I'm a very different person now than I was 3 years ago. So instead of an old familiar feeling of "back to this again", it's almost an entirely new experience and I'm starting to realize I have options that haven't existed in a very long time. It's refreshing to be able to get to know someone without restrictions. Anything that allows me to not worry about my actions as much is usually a good thing. I'm still moody and temperamental now and again, but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a bit exciting at the same time.

So last night Doug and I saw a spoken word poetry slam tour called "Solomon Sparrows Electric Whale Revival" featuring 5 poets and it was absolutely amazing. I don't know much of the medium, but it's extremely powerful to see it done well. Anything that makes you lean forward and grab the center of your shirt because it's just that gripping is powerful enough so that when I left, I just felt refreshed. Like a recharging of the soul.

So that and a slew of other things. I know I'm not good with the details, but I thought I'd give you a piece of where I am now. Bellingham's working out, it really is. Good month.
11 transmissions communicate

[07 Sep 2007|12:47am]
so were at our london hostel and the living conditions are as expected. had our first pub crawl last night but have yet to meet anyone terribly interesting. our roommates don't speak much english and i'm already wondering how well we'll handle france. Off to book our scotland flight. i'm posting on my DS.
6 transmissions communicate

[21 May 2007|08:43am]
Lis and I were able to see Ben Gibbard last night at The Showbox. Absolutely epic. He did both acoustic guitar and piano songs, and it turned out really well. A suprise encore featuring Jenny Lewis was awesome. I'm not sure how I feel about the "controversial" cover of "All Apologies", but I guess it was cool.

I'm lucky I get to sleep in today.
1 transmission communicate

A Husky becomes a Viking [19 May 2007|10:33pm]
[ mood | excited ]

So I've officially been accepted to Western's Communication Sciences and Disorders Post-Bac program. I'll spend one more year as an undergrad getting a 2nd bachelor's, and then (hopefully) 2 years in their master's program to eventually become a speech language pathologist.

I was able to hang out w/ Doug this weekend (well, Thurs/Fri) and I think we're finally going to be roomies. It's almost surreal, because I feel like this is 4 years in the making. I remember the "crew" discussing college in the news room and Mike D and Doug talking about WWU, knowing I was probably going to UW. I can't say I have any regrets, but this will be the realization of something I've thought about for a long time.

Allbeit most of my visits to Bellingham have been under the pretense of a celebration/social occasion, I just feel better up there. I'm burnt out on the UKC, and I'd appreciate the change of scenery. Of course it's the area, not the people, that I'm sick of, and I'm not going anywhere until September, but I'm still excited about a new prospect.

The kicker is that I must have an amazing first quarter to be eligible for their grad program. Because I'll be applying right away, I pretty much have to prove myself fall quarter.

3 transmissions communicate

Dollar Beer Night [20 Apr 2007|10:14am]
Yesterday was dollar beer night @ the Rainiers game w/ Brian & Rachel. We had fun, though I'm not sure anyone actually watched the game (I'm pretty sure we won). As the name might have implied, it was Pierce/South King County-core, complete with a ride in the back of a flatbed truck after the game.

I'm pretty sure we're booking our tickets to London today.

Tailgating with Jesus ChristCollapse )
7 transmissions communicate

The past 6 months: A Review [13 Apr 2007|10:29am]
It's been six months since I've updated my journal. Probably part of the reason I don't write in it is that since graduation, I'm overwhelmed with a feeling of "sameness". I don't deal with the ups and downs that I used to, it's all mostly status quo. Don't think I'm complaining though! It's been a good year for me thus far. here's a quick recap of significant (and not so significant) things that have happened in the last 6 months:

-As of yesterday I officially applied to Western. I'm applying to their post-baccalaureate program for communication sciences and disorders. My goal is to get a 2nd bachelors, and then apply to their grad school where I will eventually become a Speech Language Pathologist (SLP) working in schools with kids who have speech problems. If I'm accepted, I'll be gone in September.

-Lisa and I hit 3 years on the 2nd of this month. We haven't done anything too crazy yet. I think things are better than they've ever been. We're both working and figuring out post-school life. We want to take a trip this summer before I theoretically go off to school again, so I'm saving up for that.

-I feel like I've reached a point in my life where I've met all my "lifetime" friends. I think if I met someone now, no matter how much we got along, it wouldn't compare to the relationship I have with some of you guys. I just think that those who grew up with you will always understand you much more. That's not to say I won't make new friends, but it just won't be quite the same.

-I bought a Wii and an Xbox 360 within a month of each other. After being so diligent and waiting for the price to drop on my Gamecube before I bought it, I kinda went off the deep end with this generation. I figure I might as well buy the things I want now before I can't afford them when I'm at school again.

-I was promoted at work to a supervisor. It feels good to be promoted, but I feel bad that I'll be leaving so soon after. I was up for a bigger promotion which would've been a salary/benefits/real job situation. It ended up not happening, but it was a crazy week to think how that would've changed things for me. I'm probably better off not getting it, because it would've prevented me from going back to school, which will probably pay off more in the end (at least that's the plan).

I guess a lot has happened. It's been a "Return of the Jedi" year for me, as all the pieces I've been waiting for have fallen into place (things like graduation, Lisa coming home). Now I feel I've gotten the necessary update out of the way, I can start writing a bit more often (more than twice a year).

Respect.
2 transmissions communicate

The City of Angels: Visited [25 Oct 2006|02:25pm]
Back from Los Angeles. I've unfortunately been hit with a bit of a cold since I've been back. While I was on The Pirates of the Carribean, a "cannon" shot a drop of the water into my mouth. Currently this is my top theory for what caused my virus, but I'm getting ahead of myself.

The trip was fantastic. Lis and I did most of the essential Cali things. A more detailed account of our trip can be found in her post. We did Beverly Hills, Downtown, The Beach, Santa Monica, Universal Studios (not really, but kinda), Hollywood Blvd and Disneyland.

Pictures of our AdventuresCollapse )
Overall it was a great trip, though I wouldn't want to live there. I'm happy to be home, but here's to stealing a little bit of summer in October.
2 transmissions communicate

[15 Oct 2006|10:35pm]
I leave for Los Angeles on Tuesday. I'll be back Sunday.

I'm excited because I haven't been on a real trip in years. I want to say I was 17 the last time I took a trip that was more than a couple of nights, and almost all have been within the state. Lis and I are taking in an LTJ show, 2 RxB shows and possibly a trip to Disneyland. The weather is in the upper 70s. I'm excited to see the beaches. Everytime I went as a kid, we never went to the beach. We're flying down and renting a car. Here's hoping nothing goes horribly wrong.

Respect.
12 transmissions communicate

Estoy muy enfermo.. [27 Jun 2006|09:00pm]
I think an update is due, and to a certain extent owed to the LJ public. I'm sick. It didn't set in so hard at first but after work on sunday, I was clearly worse for the wear. I didn't go to class yesterday or today, which is rather severe since I'm doing the quarter in half the time, but tomorrow I will return with really no knowledge of what's been going on. We had our last quiz on friday, and now we have another one tomorrow. Here's hoping.

Due to illness (and a busy schedule) I haven't really seen or spent time with anyone. With the exception of Brian, Matt and Rachel coming over last saturday, and seeing Lisa last tuesday, I have not seen anyone, so if you feel as though I've been ignoring you, you're certainly not alone. I knew it was going to be like this, but getting sick made things much worse. The light at the end of my tunnel is still July 19th. The end of an era: I finish school.

When I woke up this morning (and once I decided I wasn't going to school) I rolled over and picked up "On The Road" by Jack Kerouac, a book I have previously renounced. It's ironic, since there are plenty of textbooks I should have read instead, but I decided to read the first 3 chapters of it instead. As soon as I'm done with school, I plan on finishing the book.

So I'm on an antibiotic now, which I hate to do, but I just wasn't seeing the necessary improvements happening. I can't afford to miss anything else. My first car payment is on July 11th. Oh, and I really should've mentioned this earlier, but I got a new whip (which is a car, for those who don't have the pleasure of working in Renton)
The obligatory pictureCollapse )
3 transmissions communicate

[19 Jun 2006|08:08am]
[ mood | Spanish! ]

Well, I'm sitting in the Allen Library on the first day of my last quarter at UW. It's surreal. I feel like I've already finished in some ways, but here I am sticking it out for one more month. Contrasting what I thought college and graduating college meant when I left high school as opposed to now, things definitely didn't turn out like I thought they would. I don't really have any insight on it. I'm more just baffled by how different things turn out from what you plan.

Hasta Luego.

2 transmissions communicate

[26 May 2006|03:51am]
[ mood | not tonight! ]

It's 4 in the morning. I'm sitting in Odegaard Library, extremely drunk, because the party went to sleep. I was going to do homework. I feel like I could do the homework, but I'm afraid of what the end result might be. It's crazy that this many kids are in the library with me!

I had another fun night with select members of the work crew. Mike already went home, and Brian and Kyle were going to bed so now I'm here. How do I get myself into these situations?

Big ups to those who filled out my johari window thing. Respeck.

Maybe I'll see the sunrise over Drumheller Fountain. When's breakfast?

Cheers.

3 transmissions communicate

So.. [23 May 2006|06:39pm]
COM 110 Interpersonal Communication is the only college course I've ever dropped in any institution. I found the teachings of Katims coupled with the 40+ GRCC crew so ridiculous, I couldn't force myself to go.

For some reason still unknown to me, I enrolled in another Interpersonal course at the University of Washington. It's trite and boring, but now I need help.

I was assigned to complete a "Johari Window" and it's due tomorrow. I've already filled out part of it, but now I need 6 people off of my friends list to do it as well because I have to print stuff out for tomorrow's class.

Please help!

I really need 6 people to do it, even if you only know me a little bit!

All you do is point to 5 words on a list that describe me. It will take 30 seconds. Thank you in advance for your consideration.

PS. I want school to be done.
2 transmissions communicate

[20 May 2006|01:55am]
I know using livejournal as grounds for political debate is so 2004, but can anyone tell me the point of making English America's official language? What would it change for the better? How would it really affect our lives?

My vote: Thinly veiled racism

Also, I understand the problems immigration causes, but was there any exigence for all the recent press? Did anything actually worthwhile happen that caused this to be such a controversy? Is there any reason why our administration decided now was the time to make this a hot button issue?

Could it have anything to do with his approval rating being at 31%?

Comment, don't comment, it doesn't matter. I'm somewhat sincere in the questions I ask, especially the first one.
3 transmissions communicate

[16 May 2006|10:12am]
My Taurus has cancer. Something about the bearings in the engine are moving and rubbing and I'd have to take it to an engine place to fix it, so the time has come to find a new car. It's frustrating because of all the money we've put into it, but such is cars. I'm thinking a Honda Accord would be a good investment, and Consumer Reports says they're good cars for tall people, so I'll have to begin doing research.

In the mean time, I can't take my car anywhere except work and the Park and Ride, which sucks because I can't go to Lisa's house and I can't go to Seattle. I have a ticket for the May 23rd New Amsterdams show, and if anyone from the south end is going, would they like to perhaps pick me up on the way? There's a drink in it for you! Otherwise, I can't go, which sucks because I bought that ticket months ago.

There is good in all of this, though. Portland was amazing! We were in a rather slummy part too, but when you're from a big city and you visit a smaller one, it seems so much less intimidating. We ended up getting a beer with one of the dads who brought his 13 year old son to the show, who tried to convince us that college wasn't necessary or important. We also saw this crappy funk/blues group, and I ended up talking to (possibly insulting) one of their singers during last call. And, well..ice cream trucks.

All in all a great trip, and it may end up happening again in July. RxB. Plus sasquatch w/ Lis is in 2 weeks! If these trends continue, this will be a very worthwhile summer. The weather looks like crap, but would anyone be interested in some south end back porch shenannigans this saturday? My parents will be out of town.

In a related note, I think waiting until after Christmas to move out doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I'd love to leave after graduation in August/September, but a few things need to fall in line before that can happen. I've been looking at a few places in the Renton Hills. I like. We'll see.

Cheers.
4 transmissions communicate

[19 Apr 2006|11:27pm]
While flipping through the mail, I saw this on the cover of a catalog we recently received.

How is this not a joke?

I can't believe this is realCollapse )
5 transmissions communicate

[14 Apr 2006|01:10am]
Discourse is the key to hapiness, so do it well and do it often. Never be afraid of your own words, or your desire to communicate with another human being. It's the only tool we really have in the end.
2 transmissions communicate

[29 Mar 2006|11:17pm]
Today in my persuasion class, we were asked what words we associate with Propaganda.

One girl said "Communism and McCartneyism"

.....

Other than that, I'm very satisfied with my classes! They're extremely interesting and I like being finished with the school week already. I'm glad things started rather smoothly. This has been a long enough week already. Things are getting better, though. We have a project I'm really excited about. It's hard to explain but basically we're looking for examples of products that are just selling their packaging (bottled water is the classic example) and the status that comes along with it.

I'm helping my grandma move this weekend. I was dreading it when I found out, but now it's kind of good. The quarter just started, and I'm just not really in the mood to have alot of fun or be social, so please forgive me if I'm distant.

With that I'm going to bed.
2 transmissions communicate

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]